Integrating Sex Toys in Partnered Sex: A Therapist's Guide

So we decided to create something we could be passionate about - Custom sex toys, made for you. The Evolved Tongue Tied is our favorite of the “tongue” vibrators we’ve tested. While they’re not as pinpointed as those from the Lelo Dot, we did find that this vibrator’s flickering tongue (measuring about 1 inch long and 0.25 inches wide at the tip) offers powerful, focused sensations. There can be a bit of a learning curve in terms of optimal positioning when using this toy, as applying too much pressure may cause the tongue’s motion to stall. We loved the strong vibrations and easy-to-hold loop handle on the brand’s White Temptation but found the loaf-like shape to be awkward to use, preferring the tapered silhouette of the Purple Pleasure.

If you prefer gentler, pinpointed stimulation, the Lelo Dot may be the best choice for you. The teardrop-shaped Dot looks a bit odd at first glance, but its accessible design offers focused clitoral stimulation. Our testers found that the toy fits nicely in the palm of the hand and is small enough to tuck into a travel bag or hide in a drawer. The tapered oval shape fits nicely against the vulva, with vibrations focused at the tip of the toy for clitoral stimulation. The toy is also flat enough (about 1 inch thick) for easy positioning between bodies during intercourse. We recommend the Magic Wand Rechargeable, an improved version of the ultra-powerful Magic Wand Original.

She also advises against any products that include a numbing agent in it. The Eva is marketed as a couples’ vibrator, since it can securely stay in place during intercourse. While customers note that getting the hang of using it with a partner may take some trial and error, they rave about the power this option packs for its size, particularly at the highest of its three settings. Like the Pom, the Dame Eva is also designed with medical-grade silicone and comes with a travel setting for discreet portability. Its battery life may not be as long as some of the other picks on this list, and there aren’t a ton of customizable settings—but if you’re looking for simplicity and high-intensity vibration, you’ll love the Eva. The Pom is designed with a ridge to provide targeted clitoral stimulation, but its wide base also lends itself well to sensations across the vulva.

We’ve already touched on vibrating prostate massagers, but — spoiler alert — not all prostate massagers vibrate. Some are basically just butt plugs with a special shape (aka increased curve) to support prostate stimulation. Below they explain what these sex toys do and how to know if one deserves a place in your drawer.

The Nuri is a product made by sexual wellness brand Tabu, which offers sleek, sophisticated sex toys that cater to your body’s individual needs. It’s the only sex toy on this list that has the ability to heat up; it reaches around 97 degrees Fahrenheit, which is right around your body temperature. This added feature is intended to increase comfort and boost blood flow, so your body can truly relax while you’re using it.
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